screwed up life i haf dont i? ok. that was out of point. today was quite good.. e content at least. i was much clearer over most issues that pastor benny ho covered.. e only confusing part was the experience.. was sort of "thrown" into a sea of negative thoughts.. bleah. was attempting to "inject" the right thoughts.. spent 30 min in e music room playing.. so nice n calming. heh. mayb its cause deep down inside, i came for the wrong reason. or sth like tat.. aiya.. i dunno lar.. still very lost. e only time i find peace is when i'm alone with a keyboard/piano, singing. wif pple ard, i find myself very preoccupied.. so.. i shall do sth abt it.. haha.. soon lar.. lets say starting from synerg!z? we'll see..