why? why? why? why did it have to happen? he is very young and still has so many things in life waiting for him. i feel like marcus now. i'm repeating everything he said today for the english presentation. but its so true. his was within 1 week that it happened. mine was? 1 day? i duno.. as in *snap* and its gone.

i feel very bad. i feel bad about not taking the initiative. i feel bad about leaving him there. i feel bad not talking when i felt the slight nudge of God to do so. i feel bad over the fact that i had so many chances as an usher to do so, but never did. it is no more than a year ago. dear Lord, i'm so sorry. i know its all my fault. please forgive me.

i have no idea how i'm going to do my english presentation tmr.. "courage and endurance" what if i talk n den.. i break down.

dear Lord, i'm having a hard time reminding myself that all thigns happen for a purpose. help me Lord.